Life and Polonia - Kindle version

Double - Kindle version 

"Life and Polonia" (2011)

"Double" (2012)

From October 2010:
 

I don't know what Democrats are so worried about. They’re not all having tough elections. You don't hear about any sudden upset ready to happen in Nancy Pelosi's district, do you? No awkward stories of someone from her campaign looking foolish.

I don't know what Democrats are so worried about. Look at the long list of legislative achievements they’re able to brag about, and the way they triumphed over the filibuster under such heroic circumstances.

I don't know what Democrats are worried about.  By now most people have gone through two or three divorces, so they know what it's like to buy a house and lose it to someone else.

I don't know what Democrats are so worried about. They should have expected there would be tough fights for seats in long-time battleground states such as Massachusetts, Illinois and California.

Any other President? Woodrow Wilson had a stroke trying to get his agenda implemented. FDR looked horrible by the fourth term. Kennedy was shot! And they all had wars to run too. They had a world in flux, nation in crisis, economic problems, the usual crap. But a guy who hasn't made it to his first mid-terms suffers more than any other President, according to his oldest surviving predecessor?
Like I say, I don't know what the Democrats are worried about.

"Crash Boom Bam" by Roxette 

"Stop Forwarding That Crap To Me" by Weird Al Yankovic 

"Street of Dreams" by Guns'n'Roses 

"I've Done Everything For You" by Sammy Hagar 

"Life and Polonia" (2011)

"Double" (2012)


From 2011, the Gabrielle Giffords shooting:

Christopher Woerner thinks Ozzy and Sarah Palin should record a song and see how many people they can inspire.

January 13 at 7:03pm

Did anybody check John Loughner's iPod?  I’d bet Tipper Gore would disapprove of his listening preferences. 

Christopher Woerner wants to see blood 'n gore 'n guts, veins in his teeth.  Eat dead burnt bodies.  I mean kill!

January 13 at 7:08pm

Will NPR play that song this Thanksgiving?

Christopher Woerner is trying to decide between Ozzy Osbourne's "Suicide Solution", Judas Priest's "Stained Class" or the Beatles’ "Helter Skelter".  Sometimes you just need to be in the right mood for something, you know.

January 14 at 9:19am

Irrelevant, but funny: Metallica's warning label for Master of Puppets: THE ONLY TRACK YOU PROBABLY WON'T WANT TO PLAY IS "DAMAGE, INC." DUE TO THE MULTIPLE USE OF THE INFAMOUS "F" WORD.  OTHERWISE, THERE AREN'T ANY "SHITS," "FUCKS," "PISSES," "CUNTS," "MOTHERFUCKERS," OR "COCKSUCKERS" ANYWHERE ON THIS RECORD

…and the boy laughed at the town again.  The next day, he actually DID see Sarah Palin close to the sheep.  He called out for help.  But when people heard him, they remembered how he had fooled them before…

January 14 at 10:35am

Christopher Woerner has never felt such a deep connection with Holden Caulfield before.

January 14 at 12:54pm

Christopher Woerner thinks it would be awesome if Jodie Foster made a Catcher in the Rye movie.  Did J.D. Salinger ever make a statement about the death of John Lennon? Because some people might say it was his fault almost as much as Sarah Palin's and we already know she refuses to accept any responsibility for her actions.

Christopher Woerner would include a picture of the Muhammed cartoons, but it might be seen as uncivil speech and an incitement to violence.

January 14 at 1:50pm

If you don't wish to buy a book, perhaps throw some money towards these singers.

"Jumpin' Jack Flash" by Aretha Franklin
"It's So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday" by BoysIImen
"Learning To Fall" by Chickenfoot
"Proud Mary" by Ike and Tina Turner

From October 2010:

I wonder what's going on with Al Gore's divorce these days.  There would never be so little gossip if Sarah Palin were getting divorced, and she never even got to be Vice-President.

I wonder what's going on with Al Gore's son's drug bust these days.  The media would never be so incurious if it were Sarah Palin's son busted for drugs, and she never even got to be Vice-President.

I wonder how Al Gore is enjoying his latest enormous mansion.  Environmentalists would never keep mum if Sarah Palin made such a carbon-unfriendly purchase, and she never even got to be Vice-President.

Has Al Gore ever addressed the weasels who fudged data about global warming?  People would never stand for Sarah Palin made trainloads of money selling something that strikingly resembled snake oil, and she never even got to be Vice-President.

Whatever happened to that guy Sarah Palin married?  He just fades into the background, almost like he's not threatened in the least by strong successful women.  You know, the kind of men feminists meet.

What do you want to bet he walks all over her at home?  He probably complains his dinner's cold and she should get him a beer so he can watch sports, ‘all hail king man’ style.  Real feminists use anger and make-up sex to get pregnant like a fish uses a bicycle.  

If you liked this post but don't want to buy a book, perhaps contribute to some of the musicians who made it possible.

Van Halen, "Don't Tell Me What Love Can Do"
Slash, featuring Fergie, "Beautiful Dangerous"
Trans-Siberian Orchestra, "Christmas Canon Rock"
Gene Chandler, "Duke of Earl"